I’ve lost people before, of course. To death and to the growing apart that happens with friends or past lovers. I’ve mourned in my own ways. The normal ways: crying, eating junk food, punching pillows and writing out the pain. But when I began my own death, I grieved in a new way. Cleaning out. I started out with…
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Crossroads
I flip through the winners from past years and I think How strange it is to be at this crossroads How odd to read this and see, just there The concept of “I don’t write that well, but I could; give it a year,” When before it was “I can’t,” And “I could never,” But growth always demands loss,…
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Puppet Master
Once I stayed up fueled on ramen and sugar Penned a story confronting my demons Or maybe they were yours, coming for a visit You loved it, of course you did How could you not when it was both of us The lines blurred so long ago I forget If we were symbiotic or parasitic Not that it mattered,…
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Saturday Word Salad SWS
It’s been a couple of weeks since I’ve posted in here, which seems par for the course for me lately. I’d feel more guilty about it if I weren’t writing my tail off behind the scenes. I’d also apologize for this post, but I like freeform. I appreciate it. You remember when the internet was new, and we were…
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You & Me
I treat my art like an afterthought. A side piece; I’m ashamed of My 2AM “U up?” texts when It deserves all of me And I wonder how many times I can Cancel plans before it says You know what? I’m done You say you love me but can’t put me first Why should I be around when you…
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Bring Back Playtime
Memory: It’s hot; the sun beats down on my head, causing sweat to trickle down the back of my neck and behind my ears. Not even July and the humidity is oppressive enough to make your breath catch. Not ideal for being outside unless you’re submerged in water, but I have a goal in sight, so the discomfort is…
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3AM in the Meadow
I like the 3AM me She’s the braver one willing to go down Rabbit holes of thought without Grasping each thing like it’s truth A bible to her fears No, 3AM me knows It’s all sincere but also full of shit And everything, ultimately, is fine In this freedom she flies So fast her feet barely touch earth There’s…
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Black Dog Scratching
Same old shit, different day I’m familiar with this black dog that Scratches at the door to be let in Before it jumps on my back for a free ride into My thoughts. It’s there now, do you hear it? I’m the one waiting with dark circles And smeared mascara on the mattress Like a queen of dark things…
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Ghosts in Love Rattling Chains Against the World
I keep looking for you in the places We used to haunt Ghosts in love rattling chains against the world You insist you’re still there But my reflection stares back, alone. We picked this place together Fought back the priests Exorcising misunderstanding I didn’t realize you’d converted While I wasn’t looking. Now I trace my fingers in dust Caking…
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Never Enough Time
“I have a theory for why time seems to speed up the older we get,” says Felix. We’re sitting in a little coffee shop. It’s charming. Cozy. It owes nothing to Starbucks. Felix and I are drinking some random house-special concoctions; this is before we became wary of putting sugar in our bodies. I take a sip, savoring the…
